Last month, I ordered a motivational book for my son and husband to share. The author, a personal favorite of theirs, is known for his bold, yet effective, use of profanities.
When I received the book in the mail, I noticed that I had accidentally ordered the “clean” version. My son and husband both begged me to return it- neither were interested in reading a “clean” version, claiming it would be void of the necessary motivation and feeling that the book was meant to convey.
To my amusement, when I tried to exchange it, the company told me that there was no need to return the (apparently unpopular) clean version. I could keep the copy, and they would send me the expletive- filled original, free of charge. I found it funny that my husband and son were not alone in their thinking- making the assumption that not many of the ex-Marine’s fans were keen on a squeaky-clean adaptation of his motivational memoir.
Let’s face it- there is an underlying power in the use of bad words. While undoubtedly, they can cause hurt, heartbreak and offense- they can also gain attention and demand focus where it may otherwise be lost.
As a veteran kindergarten teacher and a mother of two teenage boys, I have heard… and occasionally used… bad language. It can be harmless and innocent; disrespectful and misused; or powerful and bold. While I too have been the “victim” of curse words being negatively thrown my way, I have also found them as an immeasurable form of amusement, and have written numerous children’s book manuscripts on the topic.
When my oldest son and niece were young, my mother-in-law used an especially inappropriate word in the car. Their delight in her word choice lasted long after the car ride, and they often talked about it in hushed whispers when together. This continued, innocent recollection brought joy and quiet laughter to the adults in our family for many years after the infamous ASSWIPE INCIDENT.
However, my youngest son, a young mixed-race teenager with intellectual disabilities, recently got into a lot of trouble at school for using an inappropriate racial slur while addressing another student. While the root of this word being used was innocent and misguided, my son became increasingly agitated when we attempted to talk to him about it, ultimately resulting in him using the word repeatedly, all night long, while stomping around our house defiantly. While his goal was to gain our attention, most likely in a very negative way, I couldn’t help but find humor in the strange, and utterly absurd, situation we suddenly found ourselves in.
When it comes to bad words, I think the intention behind them should speak more than the word itself.
When used to invite positive change, bad words can be SO GOOD.
When used to provoke hard feelings and hate, bad words can be SO ROTTEN.
When thinking of throwing around a bad word or two, take a moment to consider your context. Is it rooted in ugly thoughts, or positive ones? Read this quote by Roald Dahl for some clarification and a mild warning concerning your appearance over time:
If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face.
And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until it gets so ugly you can hardly bear to look at it.
A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly.
You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.
Roald Dahl
And if a misguided person tries to throw bad words your way, consider responding with the following safe, but effective reply:
“Don’t you dare talk pigsquiffle to me, you prunty old pogswizzler!”
This quote, FYI, is also a creation of the imaginative Roald Dahl.
Have a great week, all of you slopgroggled grobsquifflers! 🙂
jennybeane.com 